I'll never be President. Neither will you.

When your grandfather told you that you could be anything, he was lying.  You may NOT be the President of the United States.

My latest CNN.com-bashing stems from this lovely commentary.

Roland Martin is a wonderful Everyman commentator, forcing the news to be taken down from its [sic] "fair and balanced" pedestal and pointing out the [sic] "truth" of how the political realm really doesn't apply to the rest of us.  But sometimes, he takes it a bit too far.

But seriously, did you have to go there?

"Can we all just stop the silly nonsense over who is an elitist and whether an 'average American' will occupy the White House?  Listening to the punditry today, you would think folks who revel in the comedy of Larry the Cable Guy or Katt Williams really would have a shot at the White House?  It's totally absurd." (emphasis added, my style manual reminds me to write).

According to Mr. Martin's assessment, I cannot be President.  My educational history reflects a paltry attendance at Ithaca College and the potential for a Law Degree from the University of Louisville.*  I have no great love for Larry the Cable Guy or Katt Williams; am I disqualified by my love for the late Mitch Hedberg ("I used to do drugs.  I still do, but I used to, too!") or the cross-dressing Eddie Izzard ("Go then!  Put babies on spikes!")?

Sure, a certain amount of breeding is pretty much intrinsic in the office of the President of the United States.  Is it bad that the [sic] Leader of the Free World did not graduate from Raritan Valley Community College in Nowhere, New Jersey?  It doesn't hurt that our Executive has a certain amount of reputation to carry with him or her.  But who does it help, Mr. Martin, to tell them to get over it, and stick in their socially prescribed caste, because they're just never going to move up in the world.  You want to be an elitist?  Better get into Harvard Law, kid.  

But of course, every impassioned comment is mired with elided facts.  President Ronald Reagan, certainly elitist in his own right (after all, he was a [sic] "movie star"), attended Eureka College for his undergraduate degree.  He never went to Law School.**

*Obligatory Footnote: Senator Christopher Dodd (D-CT), brief but at least noteworthy contender for the Democratic Nomination, also attended U of L Law School.  I guess I can at least run for President and lose...

**Nixon: Whittier & Duke; Johnson: Southwest Texas State Teacher's College; Truman: No college degree; Harding: Ohio Central College; B. Harrison: Miami.